Anyone who knows me knows that I hate driving; it absolutely terrified me for many years.  To this day I will gladly hand over the keys for my car to someone else. One of my other pathological fears is putting in gas. I refused to put gas in my car for the first year I had my license, and I am forever grateful for a wonderful older sister who would always make sure my tank was full so I didn’t have to face my fears.  She never let it get to empty (except once, but I guess can cut her some slack). Then she left for college. Suddenly I was forced to do it myself, and with a lot of encouragement from my dad, I was able to face my fears, and now I don’t think twice about it.

I think being here in Peru is kind of like that.  My God, like my sister and my dad, never lets my tank run empty.  In fact, he always keeps it near full. Some Days are filled with so much joy that my heart threatens to burst and I can’t make myself stop smiling.  Don’t get me wrong, there are also some days where the injustices of the world make me want to curl up into a ball under my covers and cry. But, then God is there providing me with just the right amount of gas to keep me going and remind me why I am here.  

I have fallen in love with the kids of Casa Hogar and all the people who work here.  When a child masters a new concept in math, or finally remembers the words to the song they must know for their English class, my heart rejoices as well.  When they have a particularly good day finding marbles, I share in their excitement. When they are frustrated or upset about something that happened at school, I share that frustration or sadness.

This weekend, many of the children had the chance to go home and visit their families.  It may be to visit a grandparent, older sister or brother, aunt or uncle, or their actual parent.  Therefore, Casa was very quiet this weekend, but once again God provided. In the past two days, I got to facetime with every member of my family, and despite lots of WiFi struggles, my wonderful co-workers helped coordinate a call with one of my gals from work.  Although it makes every fiber in my being ache for the comforts of home, it also overflowed my body with warmth and happiness. I realized to never underestimate the things a simple phone call can do.

As I was reading my bible, I read the story of Elijah and the Widow in 1 Kings.  It is the well known story, where the little jar of flour and jug of oil never run out.  God never fails to provide just what we need, just when we need it. It may be something as simple as a smile, a hug, or a phone call, but he always gives us the gas to keep the car going.

Although my bedroom says otherwise, I enjoy a structured, organized life;  One with to-do lists, calendars, planners, and countdowns.  When I was deciding to come to Casa I asked what my typical day was going to look like.  The answer was simply, there isn’t one.  Every day events happen that weren’t a part of the plan, and as a volunteer it would be important for me to be able to be flexible.  I was 100% up for the challenge, but I knew that it was going to be incredibly important for me to always have a positive mind-set about everything.  Before I left the US, I decided that whatever was asked of me I would always say yes.

It turns out that saying yes to everything means, saying yes to 5:30am hikes, strong Amazonian coffee (which I have come to adore), going for long car rides to pick up donations or children at all hours of the day and night, and most recently to a camping trip in the Andes.  Koky, a Peruvian who works at Casa, but speaks fantastic English, asked if I and my fellow long term volunteer would be interested in joining for the weekend.  We both agreed and on Friday night we hiked through our town of Lurin to catch a bus that would take us and a group of 15 other Peruvians to Huancaya.  The combination of blaring Peruvian music, insanely bumpy roads (including one that has earned the name, “most dangerous road in Peru” and is literally called “death road” by the locals), and insane altitude changes (where we were literally driving through the mountains) added up to me being quite sick.  I was frustrated as I had just spent 7 hours on a bus to go hiking, and now I was too sick to go.  However, I remembered what Calob, my boyfriend, and I always joke about: “It’s all part of the adventure.”  Despite being quite ill, it was a trip filled with lots of memories and firsts.  In Peru it is difficult to find a bathroom, and often times there is no toilet paper or a door.  This meant peeing on the side of the road behind a tree.  I had my first Peruvian s’mores, which differs in the fact that the marshmallows are colored and fruit flavored and graham crackers are replaced by chocolate dipped crackers.  And, it was my first time being in the Mountains and I was in love with the scenery.  When we returned home I battled the sickness for another week or so, but I am feeling 100% better, thanks to my good friend Ciprofloxacin 🙂

The adventure has continued and God continuously fills my life with love.  Last weekend, I joined Father and some of the kids for mass in a neighboring district; after, we were served a Peruvian dish that I cannot remember the name of but should be called Carb Overload (it was literally pasta, rice, beans, and potatoes and it was absolutely delicious).  Also, there were puppies, bunnies, and sheep to be pet.  In addition, I have had a few guitar lessons from some of the kids and I am absolutely in awe at their talent.  It turns out the guitar is very difficult and it appears I lack musical talent.  That being said, I have been privileged with the world’s most patient kids.  Kids who have all the joy in the world and are so open and willing to share that love and joy with me.

Life here is chaotic, with a new problem to solve and bumps in the road everywhere you turn (literally and figuratively because for real, the roads here are absolutely wild).   When I came to Casa I knew it was going to be difficult to see the poverty and to listen to the stories of tragedy that these children have lived.  However, I didn’t realize just how quickly and how deeply it would affect me.  We have kids living here who have lost everything, yet they live with more joy than most people I know. Padre, as the kids call Father Joe, has taken me to see various parts of the city surrounding Casa.  The conditions and circumstances that these people are living in here are appalling.  It is extremely overwhelming and the idea of trying to help is daunting, as the problems are much more than surface deep. While discussing this with Padre, he pointed something out to me.

“The thing is that this is not abnormal.  Not only for here, but this is how most of the world lives.  We in the United States, we are the ones who are abnormal”

So with that in mind, please consider praying.  For me, so that I may know how best to help these people and have the courage to do so.  For the children living here, who have experienced trauma and the harsh realities of life all too soon.  For Padre and the staff who work here, that they may continue to persevere despite the challenges and the immense sacrifices they make for these children.  Finally, for the people of Peru, some of whom lack food, water, electricity, or love, that they may feel God’s presence.

On a brighter note, the weather has been much more interesting lately.  I have seen the sun twice and this morning the ground was wet, indicating that we got a little rain last night!  I have been busy practicing Spanish and forming bonds with the children. A favorite activity of the kids is to collect “canicas” (meaning marbles, however we use plastic beads).  Padre has a slingshot, so when groups of children are outside he will send some their way for them to run after. At night he also hides them throughout the yard, in trees, under rocks, between bricks in the walls etc.  The kids can then exchange the marbles they find for candy.

In the past two weeks, I have gotten to visit a girls home also located in Lurin called Caritas Felices (meaning, happy faces).  It is home to 15 girls and a few stray dogs and cats that often make an appearance. I have also gotten to attend masses in several different churches around the area.  My favorite was on the feast day of Saint Rose of Lima. There was dancing and a marching band, followed by a procession through the streets. The area is called “the flood zone,” because last year the whole city was under water.  The damage is still evident as the people work to rebuild their lives there. We handed out toothbrushes that were donations from a group in the United States. To see the joy that kids and adults alike got from receiving something as simple as a toothbrush hit me hard.  For many of them, it was possibly the only toothbrush they had. 

Despite the daily challenges, I have fallen in love with Peru and the people who live and work at Casa.  Everyone has been so incredibly welcoming and there is so much love here.  One of my favorite things here is how much joy the kids have.  Not a day goes by that I don’t get bombarded with hugs and laughter.  I have found that the language barrier is not as difficult as I had initially thought, dancing and tag are universal languages; no Spanish necessary! When in doubt smile, laugh, or say si and hope for the best 🙂

This week a new volunteer arrives!  I am excited as I am currently the only volunteer living at Casa.  The time is absolutely flying by; it is crazy to think that I have already been at Casa for more than 20 days!  Thank you to everyone for the continued support. I couldn’t do it without you all! God is always blessing me.  Everyday is a challenge, however he always sends me something to remind me that he is there. Be it seeing a puppy on the street that follows me to the market, pasta with pesto for lunch, or the peace that only night time holy hour can bring.  God is always there, reminding me that everything is going to be ok; just take it one day at a time.

I am currently writing this, while wearing cabin socks, long sleeves, a sweatshirt and underneath a blanket.  It is the dead of winter here, and essentially just always cold and damp; I have yet to see the sun.  That being said, the temperatures are already on the rise and soon the sun will shine everyday.

I arrived at Casa Hogar around 1:45 am on Tuesday morning, and didn’t sleep for a minute, thinking there was mass at 6:30 am, and not wanting to miss it.  I went to the chapel in the morning to find the priest who serves here to be praying.  He greeted me warmly and began to show me around Casa.  We went to the kitchen, met some of the girls, and he gave me some bread that the kids were making in la panaderia (the bakery; all bread is made from scratch every morning).  The day was a whirlwind; eggs and fresh bread for breakfast, followed by a hike up the sand dunes behind Casa, meeting a million different people, and realizing that my Spanish was nowhere near up to par.  The accents made it that much more difficult combined with no sleep for the past few days, and I had no idea what anyone was saying, any of the time.

The first week has been an adjustment.  Mass is at 6:30 in the morning, so there is no sleeping in, everything is in Spanish, and the streets are filled with children in school uniforms, stray dogs, vendors selling goods, and mototaxis, buses, and cars that stop for no one.  However, I have felt the love that these people here have to offer.  Despite not speaking their language very well, the kids have been incredibly patient and everyone greets me with a smile, hug, and kiss on the cheek.  I am slowly learning names, and I have begun helping the nurse.  She is one of the sweetest people I have had the pleasure of meeting, patient with my Spanish and always willing to teach me something new and let me help.  Tomorrow she is letting me come with to the hospital at 5am for an appointment!

I am very blessed to spend time with the priest, Father Hirsch, who knows so much about everything.  My fellow volunteer has been an incredible help in learning the language, communicating, and showing me around Casa.  Sarah, the volunteer coordinator left three days after I arrived, however she was endlessly helpful with getting me adjusted to life in Peru.  In other words, I couldn’t be in better hands right now.  Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers they mean the world to me.

“Wherever God has put you, that is your vocation.  It is not what we do, but how much love we put into it”- Mother Teresa

The real question is how one packs for 3 months.  As a perpetual over-packer, I seem to still always forget something important.  After all, how much shampoo does one need? And how many juice boxes is too many juice boxes (I usually use juice boxes to treat low blood sugars, but for the sake of packing light, I will be ditching my beloved juice boxes for powdered gatorade).

Am I terrified? Absolutely! In a short 15 days my parents will be dropping me off at the airport where I will be boarding a plane bound for Peru.  So yes, terrified is accurate, but also I have never been more excited to see what God has planned for me.  I just finished my first year of college at Saint Norbert.  Because I was able to take college classes in high school, I would be able to start my nursing program half a year early.  This would give me the opportunity to study abroad, however I have always had a strong desire to do mission work, and decided that this was a better fit for me.

About four years ago, I went to mass at the Cathedral in La Crosse.  I strongly believe that God wanted me there, as it wasn’t the mass that our family usually goes to.  Father Joe Hirsch was there speaking about the orphanage that he currently was the priest for in Peru, called Casa Hogar Juan Pablo II.  He told about the children and the story of how they were working towards the beatification of Father Joe Walijewski, the founder of Casa.  We got a prayer card after mass, and to this day the card is still hanging on a cupboard in my house.  While searching for the right place to go, my mom suggested I look into going to Casa.  A few months later, and here we are!

Casa currently houses 64 children ages 4-17.  It was founded in 1986 by  Father Joseph Walijewski, a priest from the La Crosse Diocese.  The children are placed in family groups where they are cared for, valued, and most importantly loved.  I will be traveling to Casa for three months where I will live on site and help with the children, assist the nurse, and help with anything else that is needed of me.  As excited as I am to travel to a new place and experience a new culture, I am most excited to meet the people, especially the children.

I am so incredibly blessed to have such wonderful and supporting family and friends.  My mom and Dad have always been there for long phone calls and prayers.  Sarah, the volunteer coordinator from Casa, has been incredibly helpful, and I was blessed to have gotten to meet both her and Father Hirsch this May when they were back in La Crosse.  I was blessed to have an amazing roommate who practiced Spanish with me despite my poor grammar skills and has always reminded me that I can do anything.  I love you all very much and I am incredibly thankful for you.